RantWoman Sleeps--or Not

 4 ish hours of sleep. Late night snacking. Crossword puzzle and snurfly guy telling me he lives in the biggest drug nest in teh building and will I let him in. NOT Cat on desk because it finally makes sense to lounge by the window Yesterday was this sweet powerful moment in my FGC workshop. Workshop is people I hve worshipped with in lots of spaces. Yesterday's activity was react to a story involving blazing light and twilight. I cried because in an earlier part of the workshop I realized I not only can't see when people are hurt or offended, I also can't see when they smile. It was a gift that it was a safe enough space to cry in. Good news bad news about zoom: no one in the room to make one feel smothered. Bad news: no one just to hold. Sleep and eating schedule are all messed up and then i did the crossword puzzle because I was headed home from teh comtuer lab and dint't want to let snurfly guy into the building. Mercifully by last night it was A LOT cooler

 Respectable almost 6 hours of sleep. The latest in my crashed out cat shots I LOVE how Bible half hour is done except for the sense of jet lag without going anywhere. Worthwhile to do the reading between days. In fact if you don't read you miss. Hotter in the apt when I woke up than outside.  Luckily I opened the balcony door and turned on the fans.  AND I did dishes. SO much virtue

 4+ hours of sleep. Blame the almond m&M's and late night broccoli. Don't forget the heat. Cat crashed out on floor First day of FGC Made it to my tech help shift. Had no topical resources open. Seems to have gone okay. Workshop will be okay I think  Lots of people I know at least a little. Cat also more or less staying cool. 3 days in a row of 100+ temps

 4 ish hours of sleep. Note to self: get up to date on CPAP monitoring. There really is a black cat in the desk clutter. No idea why she likes the blue netting Neighbor needed to tell me her dramas when I wanted to go to bed. Crap. Crap. Crap. Al anon! Making sure grandson grows up respecting women not treating them like grandma's druggy boyfriend treats her. And monitor BS and call cops when.. but at least now I have a name for boyfriend and will especially pay attention to how the boy is doing. Crap. Crap. Crap! And hard to sleep when it's already 73 at 5:30 in the morning and there is Stuff To Do before things get any hotter. Really wonderful FGC workshop today on 200years of Quakers in China.  Rest of week is Zoom banquet on east coast schedule so I get to feel jet-lagged without even going anywhere. But at least it's an excuse to hide in the AC at the computer lab. It was 102 yesterday at Seatac and 73 when I woke up at 5:30 Ice pack in canvas bag for cat to sleep on o...

 about 6 hours of sleep counting go back to bed. I think I could have slept more but i did not have the wit to add more water to my cpap machine until I had been up for awhile and had the hard boiled egg that is the second part of breakfast. I am so so SO happy my mother has people to look after her at Ida Culver. She had a minor medical thing yesterday and I am so glad not to feel obligated to go check up on her today or this weekent in all this heat. The phone and some silly emojis and coping with family emoji envy will have to do. Yep. It;s hoit. Nope. The mocha is not iced Happy Saturday So far my biggest accomplishment for the day: find the power cord for the computer in the separate office that my wheelchair using colleague uses to work with speech recognition. The nice able-bodied tech support guy who was wrapping computers in plastic to protect them from some possible roof construction dust had turned off the power cord buried on a lower shelf.  I had to find the power...

 4.5 hours of sleep in bed after another hour or so in the chair. At least i was home and not in the computer lab. As always more sleep would have been good but I had chores to do before it gets too hot and two grocery deliveries.  Eurail travel nostalgia to simulate going somewhere during upcoming Zoomathons Rant available about dealing with Amazon but I am well fixed both with these great cans of tuna and pasta or tuna and beans salad. Also the Eurail nostalgia grocery order items: rye crisp, cheese, nutella although the gigantic container of Nutella should last for weeks.  Also impeding sleep: phone calls from various strands of adoring public. Life is SO much better when sister and I TALK instead of text. Thar we roll

 somewhere between 4 and 5 hours of sleep. All my stay cool clothes were dirty and it's supposed to be a squintillion degrees this weekend. Nudity is not a preferred response and who wants to do laundry in the heat anyway. 5 loads of wash 3 of 4 washers working and all 5 dryers. I Love Love LOVE being the only person in the laundry room. The fuzzy lavender chicken again I was going to try the card reader instead of quarters, but the machine I tried did not seem to want to read my card. It actually did not seem to want to eat my quarters for the last load either but since I did manage to knock something forward and make it work, I did not call anything in. I still need to wash sheets, new and not quite new and change bedding. That has gone this long; it can go a few more days. A Instead of going back to bed, I did online grocery order. Now to get the fridge cleaned out tomorrow before the groceries arrive. Still meditating about a blog post on transportation according to Jeff B, fan...

 5 ish hours of sleep. Fluffy lavender chicken buddy visits again. Because a multiday streak of more would be absolutely grand but also impossible given general anxiety, memories of deceased and beloved quakers, activities of the day where a memorial minute WILL help about some organizational paperwork and there are multiple other layers of stress in related conversations. So address anxiety with...late night pizza delivery. I love Pagliacci's new salad bowls but I WISH they would get it right when I order dressing on the side. And I managed successfully to get the app to let me order a medium instead of a large. No freaking idea why that is so inconsistent though also why the heck the two-finger press..  Anyway salads and pizza for several days. Still feeling grumbly about children's programs. What would I be willing to invest? What do I have to do to get past rotten childhood experiences? Beeswax lip balm is SO soothing.

  6+ hours of sleep. Woot! Go back to bed earlier than sometimes AND goback to bed after feeding the cat. And no time obligations until 11:00. Fluffy lavender chicken, mocha mug, cane other desk clutter Did I mention I am thrilled the computer lab door is fixed? I am not terribly sorry whoever punched in the window left blood splatters all over the door. I did not notice even the ones on the doorknob never mind the ones I wouldn't see because of bad lighting until the maintenance guy pointed them out to me. Dried. Reovable with hand sanitizing wipes. I am still basking in appreciation for weekend zoom activities. People I was cheerleader for were SO grateful and more than one others were also grateful for me bringing up general topic of disability.  Do not ask about other conversations about the topic. Or things lingering after a really lovely memorial. The chicken? It's zoom conference season and I need to probably walk back one thing I signed up for. A flock of actual live e...

 4+ hours of sleep. Phone holder guy crashed out on Wave ad of the week Some part of my brain remembered I had early appointment; a different part of brain forgot and was hoping to sleep in. Thank you bold step of only electronic calendar for reminder this morning. So I got a shower and washed stockings and do not want to collect data on all the places body feels crappy.  Maintenance guy was already here when I got to the computer lab. No, you can't leave the place unlocked while you go get tools. Even though the tech is heavy outdated and hard to steal this is still the pandemic and I still have to tell everyone else they can't come in. Welcome to privilege or something. Tea wasn't cutting it. I may have to go get more milk and more bottled frappuccino. I could just mix up pwoered and dilute the sugar bomb that way. I could.

 A   respectable 5 hours of sleep. I guess considering it's solstice time... Zooming all day time one figures the rest of my Zoom cheerleader gig from yesterday and a Zoom memorial. Bikes scooters. Bless your heart Today's visual for no obvious reason except I totally bless the person who complained coherently is how not to park your micrmobility vehicle from yesterday's sojourn downtown. It was teh weekend so barely a problem compared to weekdays but email now contains evidence of intergency colaboration and hopefully public education. Scooters are a great mobility solution for fit young people who never had to carry anything. They are a B#@#$ing nuisance for a lot of the pedestriating public. For instance annoying as bikeshare bikes strewn everywhere is, scooters are 1- times harder to find and not trip over with a cane. And the nutella? for now masking meditation s n Jeff Bezos and transportation. Do I just give up and order more tuna and bean salads nutella and banas?...

 a respectable 5 hours of sleep.  More would have been good but it takes a depressingly long time to get ready in the morning and I told SCYMF Quakers I would be Zoom cheerleader for their annual Session. GOOD call well worh my time even in spite of sleep limitations. And SCYMF folks were SO grateful  One set of keys larger than life Photo is accidental mishap while eating a sandwich in the sun and waiting for a bus. I was hungry and neededsome exercise after a long day of Zooming. So I grabbed the first bus and wound up with MEAT on white bread and an extremely nutritious bottle of Mango etc. juice that will last about 4 says considering dilution. Not sure how the photo happened but while I ate my sandwich about 10 cop cars showed up further along Jackoon. Twitter feed says some kind of collision but not obvious what they needed so many cop cars for. One more thing in case anyone needs musical silliness  Boogie Woogie Quarantine   From a few months ago. Basical...

 5 ish hours of sleep in bed and some dozing trying to finish the crossword puzzle.  Crossword puzzles sometimes really do go better in the morning. Neighborhood fast food now dine in Coelacanths apparently do everything VERY slowly, like 5 years for gestation. Cool radio piece. Brain was skiiping in and out and other needed sounds also got in the way of tracking every detail.  News from the building lobby: multiple people have observed the vulnerable blind woman and the person harassing her. Her home health work and case manager are on it.. Well okay. Case manager says "she's totally blind? How does she know this person is black?" This is how itworks for me but how about you ask her? As for serious socks I volunteered to be guest tech help for a different Annual session. No, of course no one can see the socks, but the orange striped one help me center Now to try to blog tactfully about smiling kids and a few steps that would have made things more accessible.

 5ish hours of sleep total. Not sure why it took so long to fall  asleep but the no food too late in the evening thing definitely affects how I feel when i wake up. Maybe blame concern about totally blind neighbor who is clearly being taken advantage of. I emailed building social worker and he will deal for now. And I still fret because she lives down the hall from a big nest of druggies. Almost 8 hours of Zoom on 4 zooms today.  Probably there should be some rule about not zooming longer than one sleeps. I am amused to think burritos from PCC are better nutritionally than Taco time and affordable and a good break figuring bus. I will NOT attribute malevolent intent to the Rt 48 driver who tried to convince me and another woman also with a white cane that he was the 7 instead  of the 48. Boo. Hiss. Other than that, whether or not anyone else needs to see the punched in door at the computer lab, before I applied tape a bunch of different ways. Door with punched in gla...

        About 4 hours actually in bed plus lots of dozing off . Less munching even popcorn and more exercise would be a really good idea. And Oh my zoom schedule. Too easy to try to multitask on top of everything else. I am a grownup. My fault that I have a total of SIX zooms on the agenda for today. The shiny freshly waxed floors are seductively glorious. The shine won't last forever so love it while it lasts. And more new socks along with pleas to review. The most fun are the ones that say "HOPE" and "HEART"  on the bottoms. NEW SOCKS

  High end instant multigrain porridge Almost 7 hours of sleep counting going back to bed. Not enough chores still. Yesterday's exercise was a trip to Walgreens. Currently a barometer of supply chain or shoplifiting issues or both. Aiming for zinc, generic prilosec, a couple other things. Zinc gummies? Huh? No just the usual tablets. Today's excitement: the long-promised hallway floor strip and wax. Even though I specifically remember a conversation yesterday about floor waxing happening today, I forgot, had to do my first zoom including host the meeting on my phone. Yeah Yeah Yeah NW FEATURES. Some keyboard dependent stuff had to wait for later. And auditioning a new earworm  Billy Joel We Didn't Start the Fire

 somewhere over 6 hours of sleep IN BED. Time  to go back to bed after breakfast even though I now know I should not have ignored the phone message that came in at 4 am and that I didn't listen to until after 6 and did not see the reason for until half an hour ago. Apparently I need emoji excess today and the gourmet instant porridge and the other Billy Joel item need to wait.

 Two hours out of bed and four plus in bed. More sleep never hurts. Song probably not destined to be an earworm but somehow an apt way for processing generalized grief. The song is unfamiliar to me but it came to me via one of my Twitter connections a journalist who has collected a list of 35 journalists like herself who have had eyes shot out by police sharpshooters while covering Black Lives Matter protests.  Thrity Five. Remember that when the no Jan 6 commission folks are whining about BLM. Somehow it seems apt for days steeped in conversations about liability insurance and spaces used by different groups and reopenings. Other topic that somehow belongs in the stream of consciousness today is the ACES (Adverse Childhood Experiences Study. CDC ACES website Aren't I just a delight to be around?

 four hours in bed. Cat, window, middle of the night We won't discuss barriers to getting to bed. I could definitely have slept longer and the go collect signatures to the credit union branch.. plan morphed into sign needed papers and spend two hours not exactly solving everything to do with COVID reopening or at least worrying about... But in-person outdoors under a tent so not completely free of ground wetess was awesome and people's care about not sharing food made me feel not the least guilty about not sharing the sandwich I stood in line a very long time for. And we all looked respectable enough to shamelessly appreciate the Nordstrom restroom And while doing disability related mental meanderings, literal mistranslation of the Russian term for bone marrow transplant could be bus transfer for the bones' brains, a new take on that bodymind thang.

 4 ish hours of sleep in bed. Some more before in a chair. Up in time to shower before a 10 am zoom.  Regular Amazon delivery sucks. It's all over the day. Sometimes at my door. Sometimes in the mail room. Is it too much to ask to have it in as few boxes as possible and all at my door in a specified time window. Or if I want that am I just supposed to try a different service, maybe one where I don't want so badly to ask the founder why he needs both a $500 million yacht and an auxiliary baby yacht for the helipad. And don't even talk about about boxes and delivery. Well okay part of the delivery happened while I needed to make one phone call and part before or after a phone call with tin foil hat person. Person has medical problems that seem worth checking with her doctor. Plus she has worked in healthcare enough she says to be worried about shortcuts. Okayyyy, take her off the unmasked party invite list. Try to resist desire to get her a tinfoil hat. And how's your Fri...

 Respectable 5 hours of sleep.  Just GO TO BED and don't cancel the reboot and try to grab on more video. Today's not go back to bed involved a package I needed to pick up and an eye appointment. Light, shadows, greenery, walkway This appointment is the annual extra serving of blinky and bright lines with a scan on a new device thrown in for fun. Tiring and dilated eyes always a drag. I actually am working at whining more about eye stuff. MORE? It's a fact of life. If I am not always a ray of sunshine it's not necessarily that anyone has done anything wrong. SIGH. Other parts of journey to my planet. The person checking me in saw my white cane enough to help but still asked for drivers license. Office is moving to a new much less greenery rich location and the doctor tried to tell me where to park. He did not know how to react when I said it probably is better transit connection, as in walkable from the Northgate light rail which will be open by next appointment.  North...

Somewhere over 6 hours of sleep counting falling asleep in a couple chairs. Much stirring around and food prep multitasking during the Wednesday breakfast zoom.  I bought an enormous cauliflower the other day and today I needed to steam the second half and cook some rice. Since things were hot, lunch was brown rice cauliflower, grated cheeses and sesame seeds. The next meals likely will skip the cheese add tahini in the reheat. I think I need to write up my weird symptoms in my own words dang it for my doctors. And here are some lovely lilacs from my morning text chatters Lilacs from a friend's yard

 about 4 hours of sleep in bed. Add another 1.5 in chair when I should just have been in bed but decided to watch videos. I AM a grownup and .. I am always surprised by how long morning stuff takes and why going back to ged is not an option. Today's schedule required me to be up and opinionated but I also got PAID for my opinions and insights. So wear the good shoes espeically since I don't have to walk anywahere and pick up the paisley colors in the socks or vice verse. Now there is noisy tree trimming nearby. So not compatible with NPYM worship asaring but I will have to cope. Never a bad day for blue and orange striped socks

 somehwere over 7 hours of sleep. As in exhausted. Slept in chair. Slept in bed not quit 4 hours AND went back to bed after  breakfast.  Feeling really relaxed and energized enough to get dishes done. Plus I was dreading cleanliness standards for some inspections and this one was easy: test to see whether a bunch of things work. It's an old building and inspector knows that. But some easy work orders got filed! Only bad part: cat considered the loud shriek testing the smoke detector VERY RUDE. I don't blame her. Today's pic with all sorts of meditations on the subject of benches. A concrete half moon or boomerang

 Almost 7 hours of sleep. Black cat in window light I have energy to walk. Not enough but enough to know I have gotten some exercise. I do not have energy to clean house. Mom and I agreed we will skip in person this week and meet in Columbia City next week. And my cat is a proxy for more pandemic cat stories. One of my tangentially quaker influeced blind people visited the blind prayer warriors today. GOOD LOD does she have a lot to pray about including the passing of one cat and acquisition of another. Meanwhile my cat hangs in there.

 Somewhere over 6 hours in the 4 hours plus go back to bed after breakfast model. The go to bed early model also involved no computer and a pointed text exchange. Means I skipped something I was thinking about doing for the morning but I got hair washed and close anough to presentable to start a really lively blindness and techie zoom call. Kitchen chores get to wait awhile longer though. Cheery Lime LaCroix in tall skinny cans

 4 hours of sleep. Good phone conversations but not enough exercise. This impacts sleep. Grey cat, collar with pink flower So much for going to bed earlier. I just woke up earlier, So there was time to dance in the ambivalences of Amazonia and still get a Whole Foods order large enough for free delivery done in time for the first delivery slot of the day, before 11 am. And now I have enough chick pea pasta instant mac and cheese to last for weeks. But I also have bean pot of the week with yummy carrots, yam, cilantro. MUCH gratitude. And instead of spending energy out shopping I went on a cooking rampage. But now I am tired and will have to save energy to scrub kitchen tomorrow. And the new cat came sooner than the late Ms. Molly's human was expecting. Said human is grieving an aggravating and recently deceased brother and coping with hair issues after a skin cancer removal. Human is particularly aggrieved about her brother's example: an ugly horrible untreated skin cancer was ...

 5 ish + hours of sleep. Four and then go back to bed when it was already full daylight. Somehow not the exotic late spring travel in Scandinavia on a train feeling I was hoping for. A bundle of anxieties but not words and people lining up at the right times.  Body doing weird things. I promised one dr I would put in my record so I remember to tell dr about at next appointment. I signed up to do a bunch of Quaker Zoom hosting. Stuff like that makes me feel like I am helping tend process at least And everyone needs an awkward watercolor from someone who wonders whether all her previous pets would get along if they met in some afterlife. The Late Ms. Molly in very amateur water color

4 ish hours of sleep in bed and another holy coe `.5 in my chair. In bed with CPAP is a much better idea.  I have friendly people I text with in the morning but not so much at night and aiming to go to bed earlier might not help.  Finding joy from someone else's kitties Today let's hear it for squash and garbanzo burrito and the bus to get to PCC and not dial a itrade about gentrification. And vegan options so I don't even have to go near whatever software runs a giant percentage of the world's entire meat supply getting ransomware hacked. Blech! The post title? Fingers originally wrote curious dancing. It's from a book by Alice Walker and then other poems got shared and there is more to say but not in this post. 

 solid 4 hours in bed after falling asleep for more than an hour by the computer. Lots of saltines and salmon cream cheese PLUS commercial but decent oatmeal cookies seem not to have inhibited sleep as much as late food sometimes does. Housecleaning and walk segment for bus and to Mom's and to to  from new Thai restaurant seem to have helped. Mom is happy with all the vegetables options on the Thai restaurant menu. Now if she can find the items that are not too spicy for her. And I want someone to dine with who likes spice as much as I do. Gorgeous lily from a Friend's garder Happy tuesday with orange joy blouse and blue and orange stiped joy socks. Oh and a lily and multiple m  morning  texts about people's gardening. All I did was help Mom connect with veggies on menu at new Thai place. Add orange shirt joy and orange striped socks joy